Lying and Baiting

I have heard several or more stories of men being jailed for sexual relations with underage girls, who subsequently have had their names put on a sex offenders register. Though, I wanted to expand upon this as not all of those guys are actually guilty; hear me out:

There are cases where underage girls deliberately seek sexual intimacy with older men. In such cases, they hooked up with older men under the premise of a lie, and some even had relationships. In some of those cases, those guys carded those girls when they met them in a bar. Or, through another type of interaction, let's say at a supermarket they saw those younger looking females had credit cards and acted mature and responsible; those guys had no reason to question that.

I have heard of teenage girls stealing their older sisters ID and going out to find men to hook up with in bars in the USA and even in my country, England; or just trying to get a sexual relationship with an older man using a fake ID. Of course, the eventuality of such situations is a knock on the door of those baited men, a wrongful arrest resulting in jail time, and their names on a sex offenders register.

This has never happened to me, but it's worth talking about as males need to be careful when navigating the modern world, it's a mind field filled with lies and deception!

Personally, I disagree with the entire legal system regarding how innocent men are treated in these such situations. It does happen, and when a guy has been tricked and lied to by a young female, he should not face any jail time, nor should his name be put on any sex offenders register. Rather, that girl should undergo counselling instead for a certain period of time to ascertain her psychological state of mind and discover her true motivations to bait older men. In all cases like this, neither party should face any jail time. Unless of course, there is clear evidence that her age was already known prior to a sexual interaction or a continued intimate relationship after the discovery of her age at a later time.

I know of a story from the USA of two people who got into a relationship and had children together. They had met at a supermarket where they were each buying groceries. She approached him as he waited in line at the checkout and initiated the conversation.

They got talking briefly until it was time for him to be served. After they had both gone through the checkout, they went to sit down for a coffee and had a conversation about random things. She appeared to be in her early 20s and her entire mannerism seemed to reflect that as she was buying groceries as normal and acted mature and responsible; she also paid using a credit card.

After the coffee, they exchanged numbers and began dating. Eventually they started to go to each other's, homes as they grew closer. Though nearly all the time they went to his house, sometimes she would go to hers, but it was rare. She said that she still lived with her mother, and given that she said she was 20, that was still pretty normal as he too lived with his parents as he was 21.

After she fell pregnant she freaked out, it caused some minor problems for them, which he assumed was because they were both in their early 20s and not ready to settle down. Eventually, he calmed her down, and they continued their relationship together. Though, she was often on edge during the pregnancy and worried about insignificant things more than she had before.

He should have known something was off with her anyway, as he had never met her parents. They were never home whenever he went to her home, and they never really bothered to call to check up on her when she was out late like parents normally would; she was apparently 20 years old, surely they would call more often, especially as she had a new boyfriend that she had been dating for around 8 months?

Despite this, they continued to date as she got further along in their pregnancy. They had still not moved in together, even after a year of being in a relationship and having a child together. One day she went quiet and had only sent a text message saying that she was going away with her parents for the weekend and that she would reach out soon.

He was concerned, but she had stopped answering her phone, and he did not know where she had gone. Rather, she showed up one night really late at night and said that she had lost her phone. Soon after things seemed to return to normal, but she was now staying at his parent's house with him and not going home.

A day or so later, they went shopping together in a nearby supermarket. Not long after being in the supermarket, the police showed up and arrested him. They did not really tell him why he was being arrested, only read him his rights. She was also taken away, and it was quite confusing.

Soon after he found out that she had actually been only 15 years old and had been using her parent's credit cards at the supermarket. Her parents were hardly home and not responsible parents at all, as such he had been taking care of herself since her early teens and buying things for the house.

They did not even know she had a boyfriend, they had only found out when she was pregnant and had demanded to know who the father was. Of course, she did not tell them, and they wanted to see her phone. She deleted her boyfriend's number and text messages from her phone and subsequently smashed the phone soon after.

Eventually she managed to get out of the house and that's how she ended up at her boyfriend's, house in the middle of the night. It was the CCTV cameras in the supermarket that alerted the police when they went shopping a day or so later after she had been reported missing. He was arrested for possible child abduction initially.

What's so messed up about this case is that he was innocent, and yet he was found guilty by the broken legal system and served around 3 years in prison, with his name on a sex offenders registry. She did not face any jail time, despite her lying and baiting of an older man.

The state tried to take away her baby, her parents clearly had no interest in that baby either. Luckily, her former boyfriend's parents adopted the baby, and it was taken into their care. She had regular visits to their home to see her baby but was prohibited from seeing the father of that baby in prison.

When I read this story I was angry, firstly because she had lied and baited an older man. Secondly, because of the corrupt and broken legal system that had passed a sentence on an innocent man; he had sex with a minor, open and shut case, that's it! When in actuality it's far more complicated than that and a complete miscarriage of justice.

After that guy got out of prison, he returned home to raise his child. His parents were fully supportive of him as they had known what had really happened. They were also understanding of the situation regarding the mother of the child, as they had blamed her parents for their actions of neglectful parenting that had led her to seek an escape to an adult life.

Last I heard about that story, those two had reunited when she was around 19 years old and managed to resolve the problems between them and had even had another child together. I suspect she broke contact with her parents.

As an empath, I have never forgotten this story and wonder how his life has been ruined because of her lies. Subsequently, what they have to carry within their local community by others who are judging them, especially him given the situation.

Likely he has had difficulty gaining employment, being a convict and also being on the sex offenders registry.

I wonder if anybody else shares the same views as I do, and has taken the stance I have that he was innocent?